Welcome to the Backstage Area

 

This is where you media guys can find all you've ever needed to know about the Metalblade All-Stars. We got the team-anthem so you can sing along and we got an easy-to-digest explanation of the various genres in metal.

For interesting pics look in the Gallery section. For the whole story of the All-Stars read the Biography.

 

Team-Anthem

It wasn't easy aggreing on a team-anthem with so many and diverse musicians. At last we hired Manowar to create something in the spirit of the All-Stars' playing style and the essence of the game. They came up with this - needless to say we like it a lot, and our cheerleaders are ecstatic:

Rip their flesh, burn their homes, stab them in their eyes

Rape their women as they cry

Kill their servants, burn their homes, till there's no blood left to spill

Hail, Hail, Hail, Hail and Kill

Power and dominion is taken by the will

by divine rights Hail and Kill

 

When performed by our three cheerleaders it has an absolutely stunning effect !!! (pun intended :-)

 

Metal Explained

If your reading this you probably don't now much about metal, so the descriptions starts off from an analogy everybody should be familiar with - the princess captured in her castle, guarded by a dragon, with the bold adventurer coming to her rescue.

HEAVY METAL:
The protagonist arrives on a Harley Davidson, kills the dragon, drinks some beers, flashes his tattoos and fucks the princess.

THRASH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes
s and fucks her....... easy and quick.

DEATH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess, kills her and leaves.

BLACK METAL:
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales
him in the front of the castle.....then sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her... then he impales the deflowered princess.

GRIND METAL:
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves.

GORE METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in the front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her....then he fucks again her dead body, slashes her belly open and eats her guts
and fucks the carcass for the last time and burns the corpse.

POWER METAL:
The protagonist arrives
in the sunset riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and they make love in an enchanted forest.

VIKING METAL:
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy axe, cooks and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals the castle and burns the place before he leaves.

DOOM METAL:
The protagonist arrives
on a rainy day, sees the size of the dragon and thinks that he never could beat him, gets depressed and commits suicide....the dragon eats his body and the princess as well.

INDUSTRIAL METAL:
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes
some obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by the security guards.

NU-METAL:
Protagonist arrives in his pimpin' SUV with a nose ring, baggy pants and snickers. Dragon sees protagonist and starts rolling on the ground laughing. Protagonist whines about bad childhood where his beloved pet canary died and ever since he has been Broken, Numb, Dead Inside, Thoughtless and not Alive. Dragon decides to put him out of his Misery and eats the protagonist. Princess thanks Dragon and wanders off to find her "THRASH METAL" protagonist.

FOLK METAL:
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments
- the dragon falls asleep from all the dancing. The protagonist writes a new epic song about their heroic deeds and forgets about the princess.

PROGRESSIVE METAL:
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo for 26 minutes, the dragon kills himself out of boredom, the protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques learned in the last year of the conservatory... the princess escapes, and is now looking for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist.

GLAM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter, he steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.


TR00 KVLT
(aka. true cult) BLACK METAL: The protagonist doesn't show up to fight the dragon.

UNBLACK
/WHITE METAL: The protagonist arrives on foot like the apostles. He sees the dragon as one of the many forms of Satan and asks God to get rid of him in a prayer. He then says to the princess that they are not going to have sex until marriage. Princess runs off to find her "TRASH METAL" protagonist before she dies of boredom.